Saturday, November 9, 2013

How.................................

Monday, October 7, 2013

9 years of loss and I walk on .................

At times my heart aches so badly, I feel as if I am folding in on myself. Other days you give me the energy to live life to the fullest. I know in my heart my purpose is to work in an area that would help save others lives. I know my work as a trauma therapist somehow translates to that but I just can't find that open door.....I know it is there. And I know if I could find it, I could carry your loss in an even stronger way......help me find that door. I have spent these nine years trying to stay main line, doing what I needed to pay bills and survive. I have lived through everything that tried to even make daily living hard...car break downs, abusive work place, seeking law change for 4 years and it being blocked, almost making national news and always losing out, slow CARAVAN TO CATCH A KILLER tours that had few stories but cost so much money (but fueled by love), Haven't I hit enough hard blocks to finally break through? Some days it hurts so hard and I get so tired on this solitary path, looking and not finding. I MISS YOU MY DANCING PONY PRINCESS

Sunday, September 29, 2013

9TH ANNIVERSARY WEEK 9/27 THRU 10/4....SOME DAYS I AM NOT AS STRONG............

It feels like everything is slipping out of my hands. Within the last year our lead detective retired, the next one was promoted out of the department, we have a greta one now but I rarely hear from him. It is the 9th anniversary week and even my car leaves me. It is in the shop because the replacement transmission is falling apart and it is 1000 miles away from it being out of warranty so I need to get it worked on even thought it was replaced this past July with 20000 miles on it when it was "pulled out" from another car. It had a 12 year or 12000 mile warranty-what does that tell you.
And even though the transmission keeps slipping no computer codes show there is a problem. Thousands have complained about this but Nissan Consumer department and they say the heads of Nissan refuse to fix anything unless the codes say it is not working----really after 1000 + have the same complaint??.
It breaks my heart to be without the wrapped CUBE on her birth/death anniversary. I want to go and get it. It is my life force. I know that now. It is how I connect Britty to the rest of the world. Below is a vent. I vent and get past. Some days it seems I won't get past this past year....

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

9TH ANNIVERSARY OF BRITTANY PHILLIPS' MURDER 10-4-2013


Wednesday, September 4, 2013

MY HEART IS TOUCHED AND FILLED WITH GRATITUDE FOR THE TWIN CITIES


READ CONSUMER AFFAIRS STORY ABOUT CARAVAN--POST EVERYWHERE!! 1ST CVT TRANSMISSION DIED>>2ND BEGAN GOING BAD AFTER 2 WEEKS!! NISSAN WON'T HELP!

Sunday, September 1, 2013

I AM SORRY BRITTY...I THOUGHT OF THOSE WHO KNEW AND LOVED YOU, THAT MORE WOULD HELP.............


Wednesday, August 28, 2013

THANK YOU FARGO AND WDAY!!!

Even before the story came on the News at 10 pm, people in Fargo have come up, expressed empathy, offered prayers, just gave a hug. These are the reasons I can keep on these CARAVANs and why I hate when they end. Across the US I have met so many kind people. Fargo is no exception and I am sorry South Dakota, but North Dakota has made me feel more at home since I was on the highway to and through Bismarck and then to Fargo, cruising around Broadway and Main in town today and the outer reaches of town, at the LaQuinta where I have stayed. I will be around town tomorrow before leaving for Duluth. Honk hug, wave. I will do so back.
This town has a place in my heart!!!

Monday, August 26, 2013

Driving forward with tears in eyes, exhausted, feeling a bit defeated. Please send fax, email, mail national news while I am on the road. Beg them to help share our story

My 1st story came quick in Neb Of course Car was in shop for half a day in Sioux Falls so not a lot of time to drive around! Been in Rapid City and went to Mt Rushmore. Reaction in City has been great but again no story. People have aasked me how I do my CARAVAN TO CATCH A KILLER torus. I thought I would post the process here. Each time I go out I usually work 8-10 hours a day on getting the story out. I usually get 13-16 stories a CARAVAN.


The day before I get to a city (usually my last day at the previous city) I developed a pattern of going to TV station, newspaper and radio websites, reading about the reporters, producers, specific reporters/ media who report on things like our story or something in bio gives me a hook to use-- that is usually 3+ hrs of writing. Like on my drive to Rapid City, I stopped at every rest stop and a number of small towns. After I arrive in a city, if no one has contacted me, I usually send out more to Editors Anchors News Directors ,etc. In every city, even before I get a story, sometimes if or as part of story,I go to the Police station, sherrifs, State police, sometimes the chamber, victim advocates, I drive around the city and park in public places--at least 4-5 hrs exposure. I was all over Sioux Falls and even went to Mt Rushmore. I get great responses along the highway, in town, at these sites. For two years having more than a year inbetween without Britty's story being out there, decreases the probability that it is heard by someone who knows something. I have been asking for help from facebook friends to at least send emails, fax to National news because if the CARAVAN dies all the years of getting her story out on my own will die also. I guess I am begging for help On the road, at hotels, even this time people say they have never seen something like my SUV before and they are surprised NAtional news has not picked it up. My CARAVANs get may 1/10000 of the people that national news does. AND if National even considers it, they will only do that if I am on the road. I will only be out for about 2 more weeks If you email me I can send you an email you can tweek. You can snail mail or fax. It won't cost you money, very little time. email me at therapoet@aol.com. Or you can post this to all your friends, get some of them. If not the email then even an onslaught of "why are you not doing a story on the CARAVAN" If not for me, then for Britty. I week and 1 story. I am feeling a bit discouraged. I guess I am packing the car and heading to Fargo..I don't mind this solitary journey....when it is working...................................

Friday, August 23, 2013

Handing it over

Am trying to hand it over. WHat will be will be . Sitting in a very friendly Nissan dealership in Sioux Falls SD. Have had alot of recognition in the city but no media responses yet. Of cpourse could be in shop over weekend which would kill me, spending money on hotel and unable to get exosure to the story. Part of me is angry, Yes angry. I really don't ask for alot. EVen cut CARAVAN TO CATCH A KILLER tours down to once a year. And now this. I don't ask for money and do most of this on my own funds, often going into debt. But thatis always OK when we are getting the story out and helping to save other lives. But god I haven't been out even a whole week and now the cost of hotels and this with the car feels so unfair. I know it isn't about being fair. It is just happens but this has affected so much.... and all that the transmission affected prior to the CARAVAN, as many know, I came to accept--that the cost of the transmission ate up the money I was to use for getting a place nearer to the new job so I wouldn't have to commute 4 hours a day,then when my son's car was totaled by someone who t-boned him, the cost of the transmission took away my ability to help him if he has to get a new car and it took away money from the CARAVAN. But I decided to find a way to fund it. Now that I am on it and not even a full week out my car is in the shop and I will soon find whether I can even drive it any more. Really.......god I am tired

Thursday, August 22, 2013

Trying to keep breathing---what will the verdict on car, 1000 miles from home, be????

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

HASTINGS NEBRASKA ....YOU ARE GREAT


Hastings Nebraska has been so great. People have honked at car, come up when I stop somewhere. You have made me feel welcome and a great way to start the CARAVAN TO CATCH A KILLER tour. PLEASE REMEMBER THIS. DNA is not about already being convicted. DNA just like fingerprints only points to the guilty. If you don't have evidence other than DNA you can't convict someone. DNA is a forensic tool. PLEASE ASK YOUR LAWMAKERS WHAT THEY MEAN WHEN THEY SAY " WE DON'T TAKE DNA BECAUSE IN AMERICA YOU ARE INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY." THAT DOES NOT MAKE SENSE. THE ONLY PEROSN WHO WILL END UP BEING GUILTY IS THE ONE WHO 1) DNA MATCHES THE DNA FOUND AT A CRIME SCENE AND ONLY IF THERE IS OTHER EVEIDENCE TO SUPPORT IT 2)DNA IS ONLY EVIDENCE THAT LEADS TO THE GUILTY. IT IS NO DIFFERENT THAN ANY OTHER EVIDENCE FOUND AT CRIME SCENE. YOU CASNNOT CONVICT WITH JUST DNA. NO ONE THING CAN CONVICT A PERSON. IT IS THE TOTAL PICTURE. 3)PLUS POLICE ONLY USE 14 PIECES OF THE DNA OF WHICH WE HAVE THOUSANDS AND THOSE 14 DON'T HOLD YOUR GENETIC INFORMATION LIKE HAIR COLOR , ILLNESSES. DNA IS 99.9 % WILL MATCH TO ONLY ONE PERSON...FINGER PRINTS ARE OFTEN ONLY 86% CORRECT. PLEASE VISIT MITCH MORRISEY THE DENVER DA TO LEARN THE REAL FACTS

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Crimewire Story...WHAT A GIFT!!

Kim is unbelievable. SHe just conducted an hour long interview on her talk radio show. She has such passion and dedication. She will forever have a place in my heart!!!!! Please let her know what you think and share this with everyone!!!
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